Yes, I am the Tooth Fairy

Spoiler alert:  If you still believe in the tooth fairy, stop reading now.  This may come as a shock to you, and I want you to be OK and not to worry your pretty little head about anything.   Go back, visit Freshly Pressed and wait for the Easter Bunny and Santa.  And remember to brush your teeth because the Tooth Fairy really appreciates it. 😉

This is me! Ready for anything to come my way - involving teeth!

Now, let’s begin.  I am the Tooth Fairy.  I provide the almighty cash when teeth are lost in my home.  I collect the teeth and put them in a special “place” in my secret container located in my bathroom.  I could make a glorious necklace of teeth shed from the children, but I am not creepy so I won’t.

I am the Tooth Fairy.  I have made stealth missions under pillows to find the tooth in the porcelain holder.  I plan my missions with ease and expertise.  I begin planning as soon as the tooth becomes visibly loose.  I show many ways the tooth can be wiggled, prodded, twisted and pulled.  After all, the goal is to lose the tooth.  I patiently wait for the tooth to be placed under the pillow.  Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible has nothing on me.  I am ready.  Bring one the tooth!

I am the Tooth Fairy.  I have made mistakes.  Once, hunting for a particularly difficult tooth under a pillow in a bed surrounded by over fifty stuffed animals, I woke up the sleeping darling.  He looked at me and asked if it was morning yet.  I told him no, that I heard him coughing and I was checking on him.  The Tooth Fairy must think quickly on her feet.  Another disaster was when the sleeping angel woke up and asked me why I had the tooth holder in my hands.  I said I was checking to see if the Tooth Fairy had visited because I knew I would not be home to see if she came.  This answer was acceptable, and the little man drifted back to sleep.  As the Tooth Fairy, I am ready for anything.

I am the Tooth Fairy.  For some reason, my sidekick, The Captain, conveniently never has any cash on the precious Tooth Fairy visits.  “With great power, comes great responsibility.”  Being the Tooth Fairy carries a high threshold of organization and duty, and, obviously, The Captain cannot handle the extreme elements of the task.  For some unknown reason, he does not worry if the Tooth Fairy forgets.  This has happened on his watch and, in Tooth Fairy land, is unacceptable. On my watch it won’t ever occur again.  In retrospect, The Captain makes an awful Tooth Fairy.  He is fired from ever being the Tooth Fairy again.  He may have to do double duty as Santa next year.

I am the Tooth Fairy.  It is a hard job.  It is demanding, does not come with rewards or benefits.  But there is one thing it does – it keeps the belief alive.  So, I will stay the faithful Tooth Fairy until my services are no longer required.

After all, I am the Tooth Fairy.

A happy customer.

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18 thoughts on “Yes, I am the Tooth Fairy

  1. It is good you take the lead role in this department. We have had more than one occasion where there were TWO tooth fairies leaving some green under the pillow. Very happy children in the morning, but rather embarrassed tooth fairies who obviously need to work on enhancing communication.

    • Lucky kiddos! That is tough for the tooth fairies, though. I would fall over if The Captain attempted to be the tooth fairy! I think by the time we get it working correctly, my kids won’t have any baby teeth to lose! 😉

  2. I am also the Tooth Fairy – but I also forget. Often. So often that our boys know to hold onto their tooth until she finally comes. Finally. Yep. I’m THAT mom.

  3. Oooh, no one is yet appointed in our household. I think it’ll be at least another year, maybe 3 if I follow the words of wisdom in the Arthur book about losing teeth. I have to hand it to you for thinking on your feet like that. Not bad, not bad at all! Nicely played!

  4. I’m also the tooth fairy, and I’ve forgotten on more than one occasion to leave something shiny under a pillow. Thankfully, it was explained that I was traveling overseas and ran out of American money. I restocked the next day.

  5. Now, after reading your versatile blogger award, I’m able to make the connection between Tooth Fairy and Super Hero! In a way, Tooth Fairy is a temporary Super Hero gig, right?

  6. One of my children had a friend that received $20 per tooth. I swear. My biggest tooth fairy dilemma was explaining why my child never got that much. We need rules here.

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